Acid Jazz Hands is on TONIGHT at 7pm!!! Here’s a dispatch from our temporary Pennsylvania headquarters:
Acid Jazz Hands is on the air NOW raising money for its beloved radio station WFMU: https://www.wfmu.org/playlists/shows/91877
Last Saturday I finally got around to seeing a little show called Wicked that’s only been running on Broadway since I was nine years old. Like all red-blooded Americans I enjoyed watching the green lady defy gravity and Not Kristin Chenoweth giggle about being popular. But I left the show unnerved by an alarming bit of Cronenbergian body horror that no one ever mentions: the fate of Fiyero, the male participant in the show’s central love triangle. He’s a slightly dim but handsome prince who falls in love with not-so-wicked witch Elphaba and defends her from the evil wizard’s smear campaign, leading to his capture by a group of baddies, who drag him off to torture him. We see them hoist him atop a fence in a field, and then we see Elphaba frantically declaiming a spell: “Let his flesh not be torn, let his blood leave no stain/Though they beat him, let him feel no pain/Let his bones never break, and however they try to destroy him, let him never die.” The next time we see Fiyero, he’s been transformed into…the Scarecrow.
What?? Why is he so willing to skip merrily down the Yellow Brick Road with a random little girl and two idiots when less than 24 hours ago he was a human man undergoing brutal torture? Why is he singing about wanting a brain when he should be screaming “OH MY GOD, I’VE BEEN FORCIBLY TRANSFORMED INTO A HIDEOUS SACK MONSTER!!!” And why does no one ever talk about this???